Living the Calamitous Life

We all rely on personal anecdotal evidence, probably more than is good for us, to develop and fine-tune our respective world views. I am no exception in this. For instance, I have learned, over many years and many events, that whenever I accumulate a little extra money something bad is about to happen. Some essential device is going to break. Someone is going to get sick. Some force of nature is going to wreak havoc with my life or that of someone close to me, and almost always this cataclysmic event is going to end up costing me all the money that I have accumulated.

I am forced to conclude then that all of my problems have their root in too much money because almost all of my problems are solved by parting with the amount of money that would otherwise have been considered surplus. Even more amazing perhaps is that the amount of money that constitutes 'too much' at a given time has diminished over time. When in years gone by I might have had to accumulate several thousand dollars of surplus before some untoward event befell me or my family, now I can look forward to a minor catastrophe if I find an extra $20 under some scraps of paper on my desk.

In fact the powers of the universe are so finely attuned to my fortunes that calamities have begun to queue up in advance of my actually having any spare cash. Currently I have two cars in need of repair, one so that I can sell it for some ready cash and to save money on car insurance. When this happens I can be pretty sure that the other car will require all of that new currency to stay on the road. In addition I have a dog with a dodgy eye and chronic stomach troubles, a home air conditioner that seems to be on its last legs, a computer that takes several hours to reboot, a yard full of fire ant mounds, and a life insurance premium due that I can't afford to pay. That last is a mixed blessing as when the coverage finally lapses I will, for the first time in a decade, be worth more alive than I am dead—or maybe it should be worth even less dead than I am alive.

I am hopeful, given the way things have worked out until now, that all these mishaps waiting to happen will be somehow avoided. My guess is that I will get an infusion of capital that is just sufficient to cover the expenses, but no more. Notwithstanding it will all be gone shortly after it arrives, it's still kind of comforting to know that a massive funding is headed my way. I tell you though, living like this is not for the faint of heart nor those of little faith. Even so, who wouldn't wish it were otherwise? I for one could use a little breathing room.

Hiatus Ends – Ass Not Saved

Our Arts & Crafts Show Tent. I shared a booth with my wife and sister-in-law. My stuff is in the right rear corner and on the back and right side walls. I spent a lot of time standing inside detracting from the general appearance and scaring potential customers away. 

So I am returned from my first arts and crafts show, Fiesta in the Park, at Lake Eola in Orlando, FL. My last post said I was going on hiatus to prepare for the show. I claimed that 'hiatus' was from the Latin for 'saving my ass' since that is what I hoped the show would do...from an economic viewpoint anyway. In other words, I hoped I would make some money selling photographs to the unsuspecting public. The unsuspecting public was not nearly as indiscriminate as I had hoped.

A close-up of my table. I thought the card assortments on the right side would sell like hotcakes. They did not. The hand cleaner and enormous cafe latte from Panera Bread Co. were not for sale. Neither did I include them in my expenses, although I probably should have.

Here is an accounting in round numbers and estimates. It is too depressing to report with any accuracy. I spent well over a thousand dollars on the show. This includes over $300 for a vendor tent with some optional side walls and sand bags, a little less than $200 for gasoline for two cars, $72 to kennel the dogs, $100 in fees, $136 in ink, $200 in paper and card stock, and an easy $100 in display paraphernalia. It adds up way faster after the fact than it seems to be when you are spending the money.

Admittedly, a lot of the total went into things that I will be able to use again like the tent, display items, and inventory of prints that I made. It's not like I didn't get some lasting utility for my money, but it is sunk cost that I'll have to get back out of future sales.

This is the disturbing part. Future sales are usually predicted from past sales. My grand total of sales of sales of all items from this show: $2.00. Yes you read that right. Two measly dollars return on a thousand dollar investment! In spite of this dismal fiscal failure, I don't count the show as a total loss. I had some fun, made new friends among the neighboring vendors, and saw a ton of pretty girls. All these reside comfortably in the plus column for someone who has only been outdoors in the past few months to walk the dogs and take out the trash.

Still, any fool in his right mind would cut his losses and try something else. Not me though. I want to try again - ever the optimist, in spite of years of evidence to the contrary. I feel like I learned a lot from this show about what to do to improve the results next time...and what not to do to avoid the seemingly inevitable downward spiral into living in a refrigerator box under a bridge somewhere. Fortunately I have plenty of inventory left over for repeated attempts. I'll run out of spirit way before I run out of inventory.